Friday, 16 September 2016

Bye Bye Baby

Happy Friday :)

I've bid a cheery and excited final farewell to all that is newborn/baby, including the baby. Don't worry, I still have the baby he's just aged into a toddler and I couldn't be happier. I've never been a newborn/baby fan. For me it's always been a time to 'get through' so I can get to the enjoyable part.

Don't get me wrong there are some nice moments but there are far more stressful, worrying, difficult ones. High maintenance is putting it mildly. Ever changing demands, spontaneous upset and it's all relentless as they don't realise that mummy might need 5 minutes to breathe. Unable to tell you what they require it's all guess work and elimination on your part and crying on theirs to show when you're not meeting the required standard. To be honest, everything is just hard work. Especially when your functioning on -4 hours sleep.

The amount of shit (I mean stuff) you need is astounding for one tiny person. Venturing past your front door is a major event. Remembering everything and anything they could possibly need, unpredictable being their middle name. Bottles (high five to breast feeding mamas, one less thing to prepare and boobs cannot be forgotten), milk, calpol, dummies, muslins, bibs, baby cutlery, food, snacks, drink, change of clothes, nappies, normal bum cream, very sore bum cream, wipes, mixture of toys, books, blanket, spare blanket, pushchair. Once you have everything (you will always forget something) it's all then a game of pure chance with most of the elements out of your control. Will baby be too hot, cold, tired, hungry, under stimulated, over stimulated? Out of the comfort of your home will the eating place have a highchair, be willing to even warm up your baby's lunch? Or will they give you a bowl of hot water to warm up pureed roast chicken dinner-seriously Costa Coffee, H&S gone mad. Ughhhh just thinking about it all makes me feel uneasy.

Slight detour, all this made me think about the baby cards which show 'this is me at 1 month, this is my first smile' actually these need to be for adults. It's us that put in all the effort to get to those milestones. Those pictures I'd love to see, they'd be far more interesting.

A feeling of excitement comes over me each time my youngest moves up clothing sizes. I considered making a fire with all the baby Paraphernalia just so I could dance around singing 'no more babies, no more babies' Bye bye Moses basket, Jumperoo, travel cot, highchair, musical mobile, thing that beams lights on the ceiling and plays the noise of a snoring seal. Nice knowing you, sorry but you won't be needed again or missed. I now skip past the baby food isle. A big smile on my face that I won't be needing to venture down there again. Bye bye Ella's kitchen, as handy as you were my boy is on the big food now.

As you may have gathered I'm rather happy that my youngest is progressing through the early years. He is now nearly two. Two is when things get interesting. Personalities shine through. We have words, hallelujah!! Limited words I admit and not always in context but we have communication Houston. My eldest isn't overly impressed his brother is mastering the English language. He much preferred me to have to rely on his version of events. Understanding is reached, basic instructions are followed. I remember feeling great excitement when he first put a yoghurt pouch in the bin. Small moments eh! The next step will be the departure of nappies and dummies. Thank the lord, less stuff to have to remember.

Don't get me wrong older kids have their moments, challenges and difficulties but it's just much easier. Life begins to feel kinder. Going out isn't a military operation, they can eat whatever is on offer. Loads of stuff isn't needed. Schedules can be looser and spontaneous. You can talk and find out relatively easily what it is they want, don't want, have, feel. Activities can be overseen. Bye bye to crawling through soft play areas and you finally get to have that chat and drink a hot coffee.

What's brought on all this baby grumpiness?  My thirties could be renamed my babties. I've spent all my time and energy consumed with either being pregnant or working tirelessly to ensure my babies had good routines, meals, activities etc. Whilst you're in it, it's fine. It's your life, what you do and happy to do. I think it's when you're out of it, reflecting you see how hard you've worked. Now I'm done, over it and thank god not entering back into it.

Apologies for anyone expecting, here's a cute baby picture to cheer you up :)