Saturday, 26 March 2016

Age ain't nothing but a number

Happy Friday :)

In the office I am the eldest of six females, the youngest born in 1995. Which I thought (hoped) made her about 12, but apparently not :(  Since becoming a mum not having the funds, time, inclination or preferred body shape keeps me away from the shops unless something gets a hole in it. So in preparation for a rare mums night out I decided to take advantage of my youthful co workers shopping prowess to purchase a new outfit. Aimed with top tips it was a surprising success. I even managed to stick to; No, you're not allowed to buy anything from Next and you don't need a coat, just drink more. However, the one thing that nearly defeated me was purchasing a pair of tights. In one shop there were 9 different types, I use the word different very loosely as I suspect they actually all do the same job. Secret slimming, Energising, Body sensor, Body sculpting etc etc. I opted for the black ones in my size. Which happened to also (apparently) keep me warm when cold and cool when warm? WTF happened whilst I've been away...

One of the best qualities about kids is their truthfulness. Although I could have done without it this week when my eldest without any prompting decided to inform staff at Jump about our conversation in the car.
"My mummy has told me to say I'm 6 if you ask me, but I'm not I'm 5. She's trying to trick you"
Thank you ever so much for that, I will remember this moment when I'm preparing your tea tonight. Anyone for sprout and cabbage soup??

Friday, 18 March 2016

Road Rage & Naughty Words

Happy Friday :)

Strangely these two topics have occurred within the same week but they actually compliment each other rather well as I'm sure 99% of road rage incidents involve some naughty words!

As a sales manager I'm out and about on the road quite a bit, usually in a rush to get to a client meeting so can be susceptible to the odd bit of road rage (RR). Well I use to be.... Whether it's me just mellowing out in my old(er) age but I've started adopting a new take which could probably be described better as Road Benefit of the Doubt (RBOTD). I should actually give some of this credit to my husband as he suffers quiet badly from RR which frustrates me that he lets other drivers effect him so much. Born from countless times of me excusing other drivers bad decisions due to "their wife might be going into Labour... they might have just got sacked...." I started to practice what I preached and it has made a massive difference, to me and hopefully others I encounter. Simply, I don't let others driving affect me. Why should their inability/selfishness put me in a bad mood and raise my blood pressure, leading to a stroke or heart attack? (Little exaggerated I know but it could happen and how crap would that be) I find there's two categories of RR:
Firstly the Clairvoyant Rage, lets face it we all usually know when someones going to make a k.n.o.b move. Next time instead of pressing the accelerator to thwart their dastardly plans (admit it we've all done it) just let them do it, with a smile. No horns, flashing, gestures or angry faces just a smile. My personal favourite is blocking access. My previous unreformed RR self would see this as the top selfish arsehole act of 'if I'm not going anywhere neither are you'. Now I wait patiently without any sign of distress/anger and hey hoo all of 30 seconds later the next driver lets me out with a knowing look of sympathy and was that a slight glint of impressiveness that I didn't have a meltdown equivalent to that of a toddler wanting choc choc?
Secondly, there's people who've just made an unintentional error, which I like to call the Glasshouse Rage. As we are all such perfect drivers it is of course necessary to berate the driver who is not like us, a model highway code follower. I once set off from a red light when my CD came on :0 I'll admit not my greatest motoring moment but definitely self mortifying enough that I didn't need anyone else chastising me for it. Practicing not been a glasshouse driver is very rewarding. A gentleman pulled out on me and was then stuck, blocking my way. I could see the look of terror on his face awaiting the wrath. Instead I smiled, stopped and gestured for him to go, in peace. I could see the relief wash across his face and as he pulled away he smiled and gave me a thank you. I'd like to think I might have contributed to his day being a good one.
So give it a go, practice some RBOTD as even though they may just be a selfish shitty driver they also might be having the worse day of their lives....

Yesterday my 5 year old was watching utube, I over heard a naughty word and the following conversation happened;

Me:             I don't think this is for children, they aren't using very good words
5 year old:  Well I'm not listening to the not very good words
Me:             It's not really for children
5 year old:  Well I'm just thinking to myself, don't even listen to them saying fu*k

He knew this wasn't a word he should be using. I could see this with his sly smile and eyes glued down as he didn't want to look in my direction. Which was good as I couldn't resist a little chuckle. I could see what he was pondering 'have I just got away with saying fu*k???'  Did I send him to his room? Take the iPad away? nope. In general terms I don't want my children using naughty words but in this sense I actually didn't have a problem with it. He's heard them and rather than make it taboo he knows what the word is, that he shouldn't use it and thats that. At the end of the day they are just that, words.

Friday, 11 March 2016

Christmas & Childlike Thinking

Happy Friday :)

Working in the hospitality industry means Christmas never actually ends. Having completed the 2016 Christmas brochure in January, this week we did our first 'blitz' on unsuspecting people who were all really happy to hear from us talking about festive cheer. Which made me think about the phrase "Non refundable & non transferable " which is probably the most popular line in the office throughout December and has now become just as much part of Christmas as mince pies & paper hats. So, just spare a thought this year when booking your Christmas parties that just because; you've fallen out with your work mates, your dog has died and the whole situation is making you feel "positively weepy" no you cannot have a refund as it is "non refundable & non transferable"

Two incidents this week happened that have made me realise I need to apply some childlike thinking far more often than I do.
Firstly, my youngest was bitten, twice at nursery. This wasn't a massive deal to me, I understand that the child who did it isn't an unruly monster (I think...) it's just one of those toddler things. The nursery were distraught and in line with Ofsted protocol had completed the appropriate paperwork with a detailed written description of the who, what and why followed by a diagram of where the bite had accured (on his body). What I wasn't quite prepared for was the final section of 'action taken' which is normally- cold compress applied, cuddles given etc. This time the nursery informed me that "the other child is now going to be chaperoned at all times"
As an adult thinking about this, my initial thoughts were pity for the poor mite feeling singled out and self conscious then I realised that they won't give a monkey's. They'll have a helper on hand for their every wim, instant snot wiper, drink giver etc. etc. Work into this that up aged two years old children don't recall much/arguably anything anyhow. Yes apparently that is true, all those wasted day trips, birthday time you want to laze at home, go for it they'll never remember!!
Secondly, my eldest was telling another child (whilst I was there and feeling very awkward and uncomfortable on their behalf) that he wasn't listening to him because he was a naughty boy. Subsequently the teacher informed me that my eldest deals with conflict very maturely and simply tells said child that he is not playing with him today and removes himself from the situation. Although the idea of my child being very sensible gave me a warm, slightly smug glow it did leave me pondering about the feelings of the other child, again from an adult perspective. When I broached with the teacher about me not wanting my eldest to upset the other child. The teacher alaid my fears that the extent of the damage done was a two minute dint to their pride before racing off playing with others without a second thought.

I'm hoping that applying some childlike thinking will enable me to achieve a couple of things;
1/See the importance/effect from a 16 month and 5 year old perspective, which I guarantee 99% of the time will be of non or considerably less than you are imagining
2/Make me feel less guilty when I don't take my 16 month to a farm but get some tidying up done while he plays with Peppa pig on in the background :)

Enjoy the weekend x

Friday, 4 March 2016

Here I am....

Finally, nearly 17 months after the birth of my second son I write my first blog!! With good intentions I started an offline blog (aka diary) 14 months ago which I only managed to keep going (sporadically) for 4 months and that's being generous! I'm guessing this signals that life is heading back towards an even keel, the whirlwind of newbornness has gone and I have a few moments of me time to enjoy writing.

I have Fridays 'off' (husband's words not mine) with my youngest so the plan is to blog whilst he is sleeping. That's me putting it out there, to the world (well at the moment just to me..) all best laid plans but that's the aim, weekly blog and if I'm really on fire maybe some bits in-between.

Not the most profound or humerous start but a start non the less. Keeping the bar low so the only way is up plus I really wanted to see what my first blog actually looks like!! VIP I am
Very Impatient Person ;)